As women, I think we have forgotten the power of having amazing friends in your corner. In a world where independent living, making it on your own and “no new friends” has reigned supreme, we underestimate the true meaning of authentic friendships.
I use to be one of those women who said “I don’t have a lot of female friends.”, and it was true. Many of my friends were guys (platonic) and my reasoning for few girlfriends either had to do with girls being too thirsty, too drama filled or too emotional.
As I started to grow in my faith, my perspective on this began to shift. Sistership is beautiful. I now look at friendship as a ministry. Anyone I have connected my life to and call a friend, I sought God about. I don’t care for frivolous, shallow friendships if you’re my friend it’s because God made our paths cross and there is a purpose for this.
I still have many male friends, but I’ve now fully embraced the wonderful friendships I have with women who are more like sisters. Friendships hold you accountable. Friendship helps sharpen you. Whether your friends are male or female, I think it’s important that you have DTR (determine the relationship) conversations with your friends because it helps give you a better understanding of each person’s purpose in your life and vice versa! We all have different needs within our circle, but I’ve highlighted these four.
As much as we might hate it, we all need a friend who will check us out of love. One who will tell you when you’re out of order and hold you accountable to things you say you want to do and the person you say you are. When they see you being petty on social media, sending subliminal messages to your ex, they’re going to call you out on it. When you told them you were going to start that business, they’ll constantly check you if you aren’t pursuing it. Having accountability in this way has kept me out of a lot of mess and has also helped me continue to be a woman of my word.
This friend helps you grow. They demand growth out of you whether it’s naturally or spiritually. They want to know what you’ve studied, what you’ve read lately and how are you growing in your gifts and your talents. They will never let you become complacent in any area of your life. The sharpener is going to sharpen whether you ask it or not.
When you want to give up, you need this friend. This friend is your cheerleader. When nobody else is encouraging you, this friend is. They always see your cup as half full instead of half empty. They’re always in your corner telling you things like “Go for it!” and “You Got This!”
You ever have a moment where you get really upset at someone or something, and you go to a friend to vent, they let you vent it out and then they ask “Well, what does God say?” Although in the moment you may not want to hear it, this friend won’t let you live in your emotions (pettiness or offense). They will always gently point you back to God.
You may find all these friends in one person or you may literally have four different friends who in some way push to greater heights in your life. The important thing is that your circle is diverse. Whoever did something great by being the same? God set us all apart in various ways. Our individual strengths and weaknesses are what makes us powerful!