Imagine constantly having to look at your bank account. It didn’t matter if you had bills to pay or not, you needed to see how much was in your account because you depended on financial security. That was me most of my adult life.
In 2017 I made a hard, but necessary decision.I hired a business coach because I needed someone to help me leave Corporate America. I started working in Corporate America when I was 23 years old and at this point I was a couple months shy of turning 37. Since I was in high school I wanted to own a business, but I never had the courage to step out into entrepreneurship. I went to church and always heard everyone talking about faith, but faith was not part of my vocabulary. Who was faith? Faith was not a friend of mine. She wasn’t a sister, mother, cousin or anything else to me. Faith was a complete stranger.
When I finally thought I was ready to leave, I really wasn’t because faith was still the stranger living down the street from me. I had worked for one company for 11 years. During those 11 years, I worked my way up the corporate ladder. I never stayed in one position, but I also hated everything about that company. Every time I sought out a new position, my mind was on how much was I getting paid. During that time everything was about money. In 2015, During a conference call, my co-workers and I were told that we wouldn’t have a job in 5 years. I immediately started looking for another job and I found one right away. I was making $14,000.00 more and I was happy. I felt secure. Remember it was all about the money and financial security. Faith was not on my mind.
In July 2017 I decided I had to get serious about working for myself. As soon as I hired my business coach, my co-workers and I were told we would be laid off in October. I immediately panicked. I just started working for this company and I didn’t have a large severance package. I just hired this business coach and now I was being let go. How was I going to pay her? How was I going to pay my bills? I was still a member of my church, but Faith was not directing my thoughts and destroying my worry. Faithfulness was the last thing on my mind. . My intentions were to tell my coach what happened and I couldn’t move forward. I did that, but she didn’t allow me to quit. Her words to me were “Are you trusting God or your bank account?”. I had never thought about it that way. All of these years, I have been solely relying on my bank account. Even when I didn’t have, God provided and yet, still wasn’t relying on him. It didn’t matter how many times He had my back, I only looked to my bank account.
Not only was I not looking to God, but later on I began to invest in my two businesses without seeing a profit due to me not living in my purpose. I needed a total mindset change. In March of 2018, I realized that I was only doing what I thought was trendy at the time. I needed a makeover and it wasn’t a body makeover, but a mindset makeover. I had to stop what I was doing with every part of my business, go back to the basics and ask myself, “Why did I start this? What is my passion and purpose? What did I fall in love with?” It was writing.I cared about writing and nothing else.
In March 2018 I finally got it. A year later I am living in my purpose and making an impact. I turned my love of writing into a full business. I don’t just write and publish my own books, but I help others create a voice through writing. The biggest thing that I am proud of is my children’s program, When Children Write. At first I only wanted to help kids write and publish a book, but I found out it’s so much bigger.
After fasting and praying to God, I made the decision in September 2018 to leave my job. I didn’t have a lot of savings or a big support system. I only had God, myself and Faith. I now knew who Faith was and we were close. Faith was my homegirl, best friend and sistah. God forced me to rely on Him and not my bank account. I could have stayed at my job with the investment firm, but that wasn’t His plan for me. Knowing I wouldn’t be making the same amount of money right away, I asked God and Faith to walk with me on this journey. No more relying on my bank account. I’m relying on God. Yes we need money to survive, but God is the provider.
For me it started out with how much money I could make. Now it’s about being sure I’m walking in my purpose and making an impact in someone’s life, even if it’s only one person.