Growing up in a two-parent home, I witnessed my father treat my mother like a queen. He was a family man, that enjoyed helping others around him. He went to work every single day, whether he was ill or in good health, just to provide for his family. Whatever my mother wanted or desired, he made sure she received it. Truly an example of a man.
When I started dating, I looked for the same qualities in the men that I decided to entertain. I wanted to make sure that if I gave a guy my attention it was worth it. Needless to say, my own judgment wasn’t always accurate and I still fell into unhealthy relationships because I thought I was “in love.” I am more mature now, and fully aware that “loving” someone doesn’t give a person the green light to take advantage or mistreat me. I can recall times when I allowed my significant other to call me out of my name, talk badly about my family, humiliate me in front of others, lie, cheat with multiple women, and commit domestic violence.
I am here to say that I understand what it feels like to NOT love yourself and allow others to walk all over you because it felt like the right thing to do in the moment. Don’t ignore the signs that have been presented in front of you. Everyone isn’t as fortunate as I have been, to walk away from toxic relationships alive. It’s not worth it. Trust your gut feelings and put yourself first. You will be thankful for it. Here are some signs that your relationship may be toxic.
- Negative energy
- Jealousy
- You can’t seem to ever do anything right
- Name calling
- Put-downs
- Domestic violence
- Always walking on eggshells
- Lack of appreciation
- Lying/Cheating
- Isolation from loved ones.
Remember, no one is worth your peace. I know it may be hard to walk away from a relationship due to the fear of starting over or whatever the case may be, but you will thank yourself later! Love yourself first! Put a new pep in your step and remember that you are great and there is someone out there for everyone. Don’t give up! You never know who you may encounter, so don’t settle for less.
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